Michael recently told me that “many men seem to think it’s okay” to wear “light blue ill fitting” jeans, which I’m not even sure is true, outside of a certain type of slightly senior citizen tourist and/or airline traveler. Maybe this is just the story I tell myself in order to feel better. But if it needs repeating, here. No to this:
Can we all agree that baggy, mid-rise jeans in that terrible color is unflattering, just objectively? Great, moving on.
I am not sure that IBC’s demographic has been led so astray, but I did get to thinking in general about men and jeans. Just like men and shorts (see my post from last April), there seems to be some basic confusion among the brotherhood about how to take the jean game to the next level. So, a PSA — and if you’ve got it all worked out, consider doing the public good by reposting and sharing with your less savvy brethren. I salute you.
1. Almost everyone looks good in “slim fit” jeans.
If you are in decent shape and of average-to-slim build, these are the jeans for you. (I, unfortunately, cannot speak to the needs of bigger men, as this is not my department. But cursory research suggests larger fellows might fare better in low-rise jeans; no matter your girth, good fit is everything).
Slim fit jeans (not skinny) touch the legs all the way through, but don’t make them look like sausages:
A guy working it:
Also, yes Peter Burke:
Also okay, for the fainter of heart, are “classic fit” jeans:
I mean, you’re not really taking a risk here, but they’ll look just fine. Get that business hemmed or roll it up unless you want to walk on your pants (you don’t).
What about relaxed fit?
2. That being said, nothing’s wrong with skinny jeans. As long as you remember Chanel’s rule.
I see a lot of skinny gentleman in skinny jeans, and that’s okay. If you are over the age of 25, this officially becomes a “look,” which means you’re in the somewhat-dangerous woods of “workwear” and other “could-easily-become-a-costume” territories.
Are these jeans skinny or slim? It’s hard to tell. Either way, success:
Also, this guy:
Pro-tip: are you a rock star? Or at least in a band? That’s helpful.
3. Your tailor is your friend.
I was heartened by a recent statistic that 35% of men are under 5’8. Also, Boston is a short city for mysterious reasons, so I am often moving among guys about my size. Even so, I took so much shit in college for getting my jeans hemmed and otherwise tailored.
Who’s laughing now, dudes? Not me. My black Levi’s no longer have that weird butt that seems to come standard, and I never walk on the bottoms of my jeans and tear them all up like a teenager.
4. Dark denim is most definitely your friend.
Dark denim is the most versatile of dye. You probably know that you can dress it up or down, but here’s a good example of up:
Which isn’t to say you can’t dress up a brighter blue:
But, again, that’s graduate level work.
5. And if you are brave, you can indeed pull off light denim. Though it may look simple, it is the most advanced of jean arts, not for elastic waistbands.
Light denim is super casual, best for beach bumming and cut-offs. It helps to live in LA, or look like you do.