One Big Room Full of Bad Bitches

You Guys! I just moved across the country [again]. My new house is empty, I can’t find my clothes, and I’ve completely undone all the good work from that cleanse I half-ass tried a month ago. Somehow I’m living primarily off of meat and coffee.

As such, I can only tangentially think about fashion right now. I need some bitches with swag to get me grounded. Please consider these two different ends of the inspiration spectrum.

1. Kreayshawn looks like a crazed 16-year-old from a future that looks like the past in some weird way. She’s “got the swag and it’s pumping out [her] ovaries.” Yeah. She said that shit. And she could give a flying fuck about chicken-heads with Gucci. She’ll totally call you out about your Arby’s career. And she’s snatching all your bitches at her leisure.

Oh yeah, and Snoop Dogg was recently quoted as saying that she’s “the missing link between the white girls who all love rap music, and all the dudes who rap.”

What up,  Googlemaps!

oh, p.s. Oakland 100% does NOT have a Fendi store, so I don’t know what she’s on about when it comes to representing.

2. Aloe Blacc has a smooth voice and  smooth 70s style. This video combines four of my favorite things…

one: The Velvet Underground; two: A Library; three: Femme fatale fashion; four: A well-dressed woman with a gun.

I feel more grounded. Now to find some pants for the day’s activities.

About Michael von Braithwaite

Does it look like I'd wear it on a boat, at an eccentric person's estate or accompanied by a peacock on a chain? Yeah, I'll probably buy that.

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